Grades, college & life

I just had a chat with a student that reminded me of where many of you are mentally and emotionally in your journey through this school and through your life. And I thought I'd just pass on a few of the main points of this conversation to you.

Grades are important. They are a major component of the decision of admissions committees if you should ever decide to go to graduate school. They are also a major component of the weeding-out process for initial interviews for certain careers. Getting good grades is certainly better than getting bad grades. I got good grades and they certainly helped me in my academic career.

Grades are not important in many ways. They should not determine your self-worth. They are not who you are. They also should not be the reason that you try hard in school. You should possibly end up with good grades as a by-product of working hard in a class that you enjoy and that is important to you for some reason. Not the other way around.

You shouldn't work hard so that you get good grades; you should work hard (because you like something) and then possibly get good grades. This is a real important point. This is one of those "If I had only known then what I know now" things that adults say. Very few college kids understand this. Some of you never will. Some of you will get it during your mid-life crisis. And a few lucky ones get it while you're in college. I didn't get it until sometime in my late 30s.

Another point to be taken out of this: think of how "enjoyment" or "fun" or "goodness" fits into this whole equation. It should be related to the content of the class and how well the class is taught; it should not have anything to do with your grade. I've heard someone say "I didn't get a good grade in that class. I shouldn't have taken it." What?!? If you're taking a class because of a grade, or if a grade has something to do with how you value a class, then you're messed up.

You should take a class because you're interested in the topic. You work hard and try to learn the material. Note that I didn't say "You work hard and try to do well in the class." Wrong-o! You work hard to try to learn the material; as a result of learning the material, you then have a better chance of performing well on projects (and assignments and exams) and, thus, have a better chance of getting a good grade.

This isn't just a semantic trick or some philosophical mumbo-jumbo. It has to do with success. Take a moment to understand this chain of relationships: like topic —> try harder —> learn material better —> perform better —> better chance at good grade. If this doesn't seem right, apply the same concepts to playing a sport: like sport —> try harder —> learn skills better —> perform better —> better chance of winning. Now that makes sense, doesn't it? I'm just applying the same process to school work, that's all.

Still, when applied to school, this may sound hopelessly naive to you. You're probably thinking something like this:

"You don't take classes because you like them. Who likes their classes? You take them just to get through them. You take them to get good grades. And, at the end, if you're lucky, you get a good job because of them."

Well, I'm telling you right now that you might think this, but you would be wrong. The grade should not be the focus of your efforts; the process (the class and the material) should be the focus. Everything else will then flow naturally from that — including good grades on classes that you like and jobs that are related to this material that you like. Again, this is just like sports. Winning should not be the focus of your efforts; performing up to your capabilities should be your focus. If you do so, then winning will come. You can't (or, at least, shouldn't) measure your performance by whether you won or you lost — you should look at whether you prepared correctly to give yourself the best chance to perform well. If you did that, then you have to accept the outcome. As Bill Parcells says, "You are what you are."

Again, the process — in this case, the class and the assignments — should be the focus of your efforts. This statement might not make any sense to you but it's been a guiding statement in my life (since my life started making some sense, anyway). Don't focus on the end; focus on the journey. Focus on the process of learning. Focus on enjoying the class as you sit in it. Focus on the new topics that you encounter. Focus on the challenges that you come across. Focus on how you can apply what you learn to your life. And so on. In our life, all we have is what we do and who we come in contact with. You should focus on getting the most out of both of these.

If you're focusing on the process, you will become more engaged with the material. Having become more engaged, you will learn it better ... and off you go (as we discussed above).

I'm not encouraging you to not get good grades. I'm saying that I think you should focus on the learning process and let the grades take care of themself. I'm encouraging you to think about who you are, how you choose classes, how you think about your classes, and why you're in school. You'll be better for it because you'll learn more and enjoy your time in school more. And as a side effect, you'll also end up enjoying your life after school more. And I think that we can all agree that's a good thing.